June 11

For the last several days, this question has been popping up. I got it twice today. So, I thought I would respond here to anyone who hasn't asked the question but has it in their minds.
Question: So, how do you feel NOW about reading the Bible in a Year and your blog?
Answer: The pat answer is that I would not have made it this far into the Bible if I hadn't had the blog. Having to post something every day has really kept me accountable.
I have a bad habit of committing to a large escapade and then when the going gets rough, ditching.
And I have had some rough moments early on with time commitments and now with some of the material that I have been reading. It makes me realize just how selective we are in Sunday School, preaching topics, scripture quotes when you get to some of the more, shall we say, distasteful scriptures. I crave a good Bible teacher to help me through these passages. Even my medieval rabbis have deserted me on these passages giving it the standard "it is all God's plan" or just plain silence. Not Torah, you see, just the 'minor' books of the Tankh.
But if I have been questioning, God has been FAITHFUL. At almost every turn of the outburst of 'I just don't get it and I just don't understand', I have felt and seen the presence of God. You might call that "A Sign".
Today in Sunday School, Ron was teaching on Isaiah chapter 7-8 and the video instructor quoted these verses: vs. 10-12 "Again the Lord spoke to Ahaz (king of Judah), 'Ask the Lord your God for a sign, whether in the deepest depths or the highest heights.'
But Ahaz said, 'I will not ask; I will not put the Lord to the test.'"
I guess I am not as faithful as Ahaz, I would have asked for a sign. But it doesn't matter. God provides me one when I need it.
Last week, for example, I was all over the money issue in one of rich boy Solomon's proverbs and the lack of discussion in church about money. What did Ron preach about last Sunday? Money. What it can and can't buy. I took that as a sign.
You can take me as a crazy woman. Hearing voices, seeing billboards, reading bird poop and bird behavior (I do this, too. I just don't write about it.)
But I find it totally reassuring that God is on this journey with me and knows and appreciates my doubts, questions, arguments, disbelief, even my temper tantrums.
And if I have learned one thing in this Bible in a Year, it is to keep going.
And Dear Reader, I have a debt of gratitude to you. I would have missed this whole, glorious conversation with God because I would have bailed but I was afraid to let you down.
So, now, let me inspire you. If you are in a hard place with these parts, be kind to yourself. Lay the burden on God. I promise, He is so much bigger than Solomon and his fancy-smancy golden palaces and John's pretentious Jesus.
But keep going. You can do this. We can do this together.

Grace and Peace to you.